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three weeks and three interviews later we find out that chris did not get the job that we were so, so hoping that he would be offered. it seemed like the most perfect fit a job could get for my sweet hubby, and after he told me i almost cried. later that day i was near tears once more and about to send out invitations to my blast of a pity party when i, well, stopped. i thought long and hard about past so-called regrets and so-called missed opportunities and realized if those things had actually come to fruition like i had wanted them to, i wouldn't be standing where i am right now. on the corner of positively marvelous and just do it already.

so, we are thinking of making a big leap. taking a big chance. changing our lives.
and it's thrilling.

i am wanting to go to a small college nearby and get my bachelors in their fabulous liberal arts program. just think- painting, and photography, and dancing. oh, my! chris wants to finally get a bachelors in business management that he would probably take online, on top of a full time job. we would most likely have to enroll the kids in a sweet charter school, which is not so sweet to try to pay for. i would need to get a part time job as well. and the coordination to make all this happen on a continual basis is making my head spin.

is it just me or does that sound exhausting? and very, very expensive. anyone want to give us loads of cash and scholarships? or maybe, just maybe, we can convince the grandparents down south to live nearby and have lots of grandparent sleepover extravaganzas.
no pressure.

i think we are crazy to even consider it.
and even crazier not to.

a word about words

There is no word to describe the power of words. It is amazing how one simple word can invoke feelings, change a mood, or plant a seed. Every human being on the face of the earth, no matter gender, race, nationality, or economic status, has the freedom to use words in whatever capacity they choose. Songs, poems, books, speeches, conversations, emails, blog posts-all made up of single words. Words can ignite fear, be a war cry, bring pain, erode trust, start a genocide. Words can bring hope and light, be the stepping stones to peace and enlightenment, fill up the empty spaces in our souls, make us laugh, start a revolution.

We choose which words are in our minds, on our tongues, in our hearts. We choose which words surround us throughout the day and night. We choose the the words we think in our heads that form the messages we tell ourselves over and over again.

We choose.
+++++++++++++++++++++++

I came up with the list of school/unschool words while reflecting on a modern dance performance I was able to attend a few weeks ago. In one particular number there were two dancers, one with a flowing, beautiful dress and loose hanging hair down her back, the second dancer was dressed plainly in dark colors, her hair was tightly wound up close to her head.

We then heard a woman's voice saying single words. Her voice was soothing and curvy, rolling off her tongue, beauty in every syllable. The words she said felt warm and soothing. Her words sounded inviting and brought a joyful celebrating quality to the room. Like- delectable, papaya, enchantment, and tactile. The dancer moved with an oozing, curvy, fluid quality that matched the words we heard.

The second dancer was quite the opposite. The words spoken while she moved were harsh, pointed, raw. Like- aardvark, scrub, deception, sasquatch. When the dancer moved she had sharp, choppy movements.

As an audience member I had two distinctly different feelings with each dancer. It was quite simply a demonstration on the power of words.

While reflecting on the movement, schoolish (my own word) words started running through my head narrated in that harsh, pointed voice. Feelings of dread and fear engulfed me.

Then I tried out unschooling words narrated in the soothing, fluid voice. I felt peaceful.

How interesting and curious, I thought. I could type out a list of words and that would sum up my reasons for unschooling just by the feelings they brought with them. A reader of my words could experience a little piece of my understanding on life just from a list of words.

How mighty are the power of words! How will we use them? What will we create? What feelings and changes will occur because of our words?

It is all in our hands.
It is all up to us.

the glass is half full

I love my kids and their takes on life.

For example, today, sunny girl was reaching into the candy jar to help herself to a nutritious and filling lunch of left over candy canes when Xavi caught wind of the situation and promptly followed suit.

Except, gasp, there was only a part of a candy cane left.

Was there a candy cane throwing, screaming -while-kicking-the-cabinets -melt-down, you ask??

Nope.

He just shrugs, rips it open and says:

Ah well, half a candy cane is better than nothin'.

Your right there little son, oh so right.

You're Fired!!!

So lately, when Xavier is really upset at someone and life is feeling rotten for him, he has been letting us all know by screaming at the top of his lungs, and I do mean at the top of his lungs, "YOUR'E FIRED!!!"

When he first started doing this a week or so ago my first thought was where did he get that from? I haven't heard Dora the Explorer tell Boots the monkey that he is a really lousy monkey sidekick and he better find his butt a new job. Nor have I heard anyone tell Elmo that if he refers to himself in the third person one more time he's out of there. And we have never, ever seen one episode of The Apprentice.

Cue Donald Trump photo.........................................













So it just became something Xavier did, not much more thought was given on it.

Until, I was thinking about it while nursing Soleil this evening (get lots of thinking done then) and had to laugh out loud. And I did do just that.

How funny is it that my 3 year old knows exactly what to say to send the clear message to his mother that she needs to step off (a fun new saying around here.) And why haven't I given it much more thought on why my son is telling me to get a new day job. And night job.

Possibly it is the shrill tone in which he is delivering the message. I am just tuning out the screaming and have not been focusing on what he is trying to get through my thick skull. And it must be thick.

I suppose it's time to think on why my son wants me fired in the first place. And now that his message to me has finally sunken in I promise to ponder it deeper.

Oh the wisdom of a 3 year old is something to cherish. Not only that, how cool would it be to be able to really stick it to that person that gets under your skin and just tell them, You're Fired!!!

But I won't.