at the park

we discovered a new secret place in our neighborhood park. a shaded woody grove running along the stream. a place to dodge in and out of the tree limbs. a place to pick up the green slime in the water and wonder about it.

because we were caught up in the newness of our discovery i had almost forgot that i had left the stroller with all of our essentials at the start of the path, out of sight. while walking back to retrieve it i passed a young teenage boy with his hood pulled up tight, head down. i immediately felt a little panicked. sadly, my first thought was this kid must be up to no good. my reality doesn't often come face to face with teenagers, so, my reaction was immediately fear. my fear was shattered the instant we met eyes and he gave me a small, shy smile. i smiled back, glad to see that he seemed happy.

later, while walking with the kids to the playground we passed the same boy sitting in a circle with his friends on the bank of the river. they were talking passionately, laughing.

seeing this circle of friends made me flash back to my memories of sitting amongst my best friends. i smile while remembering the idiotic and immature, yet thoroughly outrageous fun we'd have. these friends will always remain as the roots of my spirit, my foundation in which i have been able to grow from.

looking back though i don't remember interacting with many adults other than teachers or parents. our existence was completely separate from our community save those few tolerated exchanges. it was just understood that you weren't really welcome or understood by anyone other than your own. this never really bothered me at the time, it was just the way things were.

that gets me back to my story of this young man. a little while later into our park adventure i saw that those same friends had gotten busted by the cops. they were being scolded and i overheard the words truancy, office, and parents. the teenagers all had their heads down. they were once again getting the message, you are not welcome here, nailed into their skulls.

my heart sank. i desperately wanted to meet their eyes, to let them know not all adults consider them troublemakers and want them rounded up in schools to keep a heavy eye on their every move.

it struck me then how sad it is that i never see nor interact with any teenagers in my life. even more sad that i have bought into the popular belief that teenagers should be hidden from society because they don't belong. how is it that i so strongly believe with all of who i am that children shouldn't be pushed away into schools but rather that they belong in the heart of our community, yet i had never thought about teenagers being a part of this discriminated population of children. when my children grow to become teenagers won't i want them to seen by their community as an integral and vital piece of the pie instead of being shut out?

i would never blame those kids for wanting to break free from the grip of bully adults even for a few moments and even at the cost of severe punishment. they need and deserve privacy and respect just like the rest of us demand. teenagers have it especially hard since they are stuck between childhood and adulthood. not old enough to be on their own completely while still needing the love and support of family and community, yet growing into this more adult mind and self awareness that truly thrives on autonomy.

that is such an unfair spot to be stuck in.

our society's current stance is to control these young people and give them absolutely no choice to the contrary. those that try to break free from this controlling hand are considered unruly and to be troublemakers. so the individuals that are fighting for choice over their own lives fuel the popular belief to tighten the iron grip of control even more and thus the ugly cycle goes round and round.

what about painting this picture differently? what if we instead welcomed children and teenagers alike with open arms into our communities? what if our town centers, parks, and streets were buzzing with youthful energy and people of all ages were free to mingle and learn from one another without fear of being hounded down? what if we loosened the grip of control on these young minds and instead adopted the beliefs of trust and loving guidance?

to some it may sound like a idealistic pipedream.

to me, it sounds beautiful.

and this mind shift of mine is all thanks to the young man at the park.

thanks to him i will never look at teenagers the same way again.